Before I started my weight loss journey, I couldn’t list one thing that I liked about myself. I hated every inch of my body. In particularly my thighs and my stomach, both of which bare my tiger stripes. I hated my body because to me, my reflection was ugly and undesirable. It has taken me a while to come to terms with the way my body looks, and I still struggle sometimes during intimacy showing my whole body.
Today, I can list a few things down that I like about myself; • My wrists. • My eyes. • My lips. • My skin.
This all started with a friend suggesting I try and list 10 things I like about myself. At the time/ and today, I can’t make it to 10. However, I have made it to 4 and I’m happy with that number.
Below I’ve attached a PDF that you may download and print off, to help you get started on describing the aspects that you like about yourself. Have a look at your reflection, look into your eyes, feel your skin and appreciate your body.
I didn’t do much today; I’m menstruating and feel exhausted with everything that’s going on in my life. Do you know when your support networks are faulty? I ‘ve just wanted to sleep all day today.
Tuesday 4th August
I had planned on going out for a 45-minute walk. But that’s not going to be happening. I’ve been in bed for hours upon hours.
Wednesday 5th August
Noted down as a rest day. And I truly have rested today, I checked off nothing on my to-do list.
Thursday 6th August
I went for a long walk today, had planned 45 minutes but ended up walking for about 1hrs and 30 minutes, with 15kg weight in tow. It was baking outside and I was sweating, kept up with my water intake and powered through the streets, all the way home.
Proud is how I felt. I think during menstruation, I just need to rest up. But towards the end and when its over, I feel more motivated to get out and about.
Friday 7th August
I borrowed a folding bike from Brompton 😊 The fear I felt as I sat down onto the saddle and pushed forward on the cycle. HONESTLY, I was frightened.
Until that point, I hadn’t been on a cycle in a very long time. I made a mental note at the time, that I fear many things in life and then I stir it around my thoughts, over and over. Until I convince myself only bad will come from it.
However, I felt like a Super-Hero cycling around the local park and around a few quiet streets.
Saturday 8th August
WOW! What a challenging day it has been for me.
I decided to return the Brompton today, as my bum and legs were stiff from cycling yesterday. However, the locker was based in the heart of the city centre, which meant I had the chance to push this amazing bike through the city, or saddle up and cycle.
I did both! Haha.
I pushed it up, parts of the route that had steep hills. And I cycled as much as I could. What a feeling! Apologies for my misuse of the exclamation mark, but I’m so proud. I cycled my way through a few core fears. I sweated like a jacket-potato, drizzled in olive oil and wrapped in foil. But I made it!
I then gulped the water I had packed in my backpack and walked back home.
Sunday 9th August
Had planned on going out for a jog/run, but I couldn’t my body was tired and it’s better to rest and relax than to overexert myself. I had a hot and steamy shower, then I gave my home a good deep clean.
At my heaviest weight, the scales displayed 19 Stones and 4lbs.
I can’t tell you how hard this is for me to write. I’m ashamed of myself for eating my way to that size.
This week has been a challenging week, due to some thing’s I’m dealing with in my personal life. Not many people in today’s society acknowledge the fact that they contribute to the lives of those around them. Even if they don’t fully appreciate that fact.
For instance, you can choose to fat shame a person, or you can choose to support them on their weight-loss journey. Everything you choose to do will no doubt have an impact on those around you.
I once called for the lift as I was taking my lunch down a few floors to consume back in the office – (staff kitchen was 2 floors above the office and was crowded at the time.) The lift arrived and I saw that it had around 5 people inside, so I simply said, ‘I’ll wait for the next one.’ An older man looked me up and down and replied, ‘don’t you think you should take the stairs?’
This happened around 2013 – it is now 2020 and I recall this memory as if it happened yesterday. I remember how his blue eyes scanned my entire body, how his lips snarled before he spoke and how he turned his nose up in disgust.
It hurt and I never gained anything from this encounter, but to feel shame and hatred for myself, even more than before.
Today, I’m working towards my goal of losing 56 lbs through healthy plant-based eating and increasing exercise. You’ll begin to see more and more tools that I’ll be incorporating into my life. Not only do I wish to lose weight but I aspire to transform my lifestyle for good health. No more do I wish to be the topic of a fat-shaming moment. Nor do I wish to feel ashamed about my body and how unhealthy I’ve allowed myself to become.
It’s true, I’ve made huge progress, in terms of diet – giving up meat and transitioning across to plant-based food consumption. Walking more and pushing through my fears fitness in the great outdoors. This post wasn’t easy to share, as I’ve now told the world that at my heaviest I weighed 19 stones and 4lbs. I can’t explain enough how important it is that our society learns to be kind to others. I’ve read about people committing suicide, due to being bullied, fat-shamed about their weight. Let’s not allow more lives to be ended in such a manner.
To those of you that have fat-shamed others, please take a moment to reflect upon the impact those nasty comments can have on those people.
For all of you that have been on the receiving end of fat-shaming, I understand how it hurts and can set you back or even knock you off your health-journey. I agree, it’s a painful blow and while the scars aren’t visible, these encounters stay in your mind for a lifetime.
Please, stay strong and push through!
You are beautiful.
You are needed!
You are amazing!
Our universe needs you to stand tall and continue on your health journey, you are here for a greater purpose and I need you to remember – You are unique.
I’m always hearing people express their perceived losses if they chose to switch to a plant-based diet. ‘But I won’t be able to eat burgers and I love burgers!’
Honestly, I get that change is scary and when it involves giving up something that you have been taught to love, i.e. eating animals; I do understand the apprehension and I can somewhat relate to it as I’ve been there and said that!
The thing is, without change you’ll continue to receive the same results that our universe will deliver. We must change the way we eat, for a healthier, more sustainable lifestyle. I haven’t yet started a family of my own, but I already know I want to do as much as I can before I leave this world.
If my contribution is posting weekly on my blog, then so be it.
I know many people are incorporating/adopting a more plant-based diet and I salute them. However, I know we can all do more to protect life on our Earth and to transition across to a plant-based lifestyle. Which come ready with a plethora of positives.
I don’t miss any aspect of my previous diet that was made up of animal meat and vegetables. I’m happier with my new lifestyle – my plant-based way of living.
This month I’ve decided to focus on my cycling, as I’m not a great cyclist. I’ll be riding short distances first and seeing how I get on. I know cycling is great for an all-over body workout, so I aim to shed at least 8lbs this month. What are your fitness plans over the coming weeks? And how is your health journey going so far?
As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. I only endorse products that I use personally andhave something positive to share with you all.
I do hope your weight-loss journey is going positive for you? Do let me know in the comments section below, I do enjoy communicating with those of you on the same weight-loss experience.
For a while, I’ve been reading a lot of literature both online and in print. I spend time reading about aspects of weight-loss and sifting out what may apply to my health journey. I came across an image on Instagram, that suggested this method that I’m now sharing with you all.
Method
Decide on how much weight you want to lose? I’ve decided that I’m going to lose 4stones which is equal to 56lbs. Each marble is the equivalent of 1lb
Then label both jars: One with the word ‘LOSS’ and the other with the word, ‘CURRENT.’ Or words you feel that will fit/mean the same thing.
Place your weight-loss goal in lbs on the 3rd label, and position that above the label, ‘CURRENT.’
Count out your marbles! Haha, with this part I became so distracted. I mean, who didn’t enjoy playing with marbles as a child? I counted out 56 in about 2hrs lol.
Place the counted marbles into the jar labelled, ‘CURRENT.’
As you lose weight, move the appropriate number of marbles across to the jar titled, ‘LOSS.’
I hope you find this tip useful, and you feel motivated to lose weight and enjoy your journey. I want you to know that I’m here with you and you may reach out by commenting below or completing a contact form. I will always try to respond directly to you, if not, I will certainly make a blog post and share my answers.
I felt so full and bloated after, so I had a cup of this tea. Surprisingly so, I was able to relieve my bowels within 30 minutes.
I went to bed a little more comfortable than I had started. I’m sharing this with you because, often herbal teas are overlooked, in favour of chemicalised medication. (I’m not saying that prescriptions aren’t sometimes needed.) But do educate yourself first and try to find a natural plant-based product that you can try.
I mean, wheres the harm in trying first?
I drank 2/3 of this herbal tea and it was the best thing I had done last night. I felt much better in the morning and started my day with a plant-based smoothie. Weightloss is about learning what’s best for your health. There’s not a one-size-fits-all with my methodology.
When I first started going out walking, I always used to stretch after my workout. I figured getting warmed up should be enough.
However, I later learnt that it is important to stretch. It helps with all the above and I’ve found that it helps immensely. I recommend everyone implements this best practice into all of their workouts.
Today is the day that all shoppers in England are required to wear a face-covering when shopping. This is to help prevent the spread of COVID19 and to adhere to the rules of social distancing.
I know there exists pockets of people that don’t like this at all and they feel strongly against wearing a face covering. My stance on this is that you’re not being asked to go and fight in a war.
And what is your preference? A face-covering or a ventilator?
Growing up I always heard conversations surrounding the definition of a proper meal, meat and two vegetables. I grew up believing that meat and two veg on your plate, equated to the best meal for all!
When in actuality, it wasn’t for me.
Through conversations I’ve had with others about diet and healthy eating, I discovered (within my circles) many people believe that to have a decent plant-based meal, you need a variety of vegetables and a meat alternative.
Why though? Is how I would reply. These days that is. Remember, I was once an avid meat-eater. So I do understand the thought process that often consists of: how can you survive without eating meat, etc.
For me, I find that 3 vegetables are more than sufficient to make a healthy plant-based meal.
You can survive without consuming animal flesh, I know it may seem uncomfortable to read that sentence, but with all due respect – that is what meat-eaters do, they eat the corpses of animals.
You don’t need a basket of vegetables to create a tasty, healthy and plant-based dish. All you need is 3 vegetables and the mindset to let yourself flourish as a home cook. I mean, I’m no Michelin star chef, but I still cook and enjoy most of my meals. I say most as some of my meals are vile. But that does not stop me from trying again.
Random groups of 3 vegetables:
Potatoes, onions and carrots.
Pumpkin, potatoes and broccoli.
Peppers, onions and carrots.
Potatoes, spinach and beetroot.
I’m not saying you should only stick to 3 vegetables when cooking, I’m simply highlighting that you don’t need meat and equally, you don’t need a whole pot of vegetables to enjoy eating plant-based.
What are the random dishes that you have created with vegetables?
Do you enjoy cooking?
Where are you on your weight loss journey?
Feel free to comment below and remember that only you can improve your health.
A few weeks ago, a dear friend of mine suggested that I try fasting, as they found it to be a great way to cleanse their system and reported feeling much better after. They informed me that they felt the following:
Increased sense of mental clarity.
Enhanced ability to ignore food cravings – better willpower!
Give the body a chance to rest from digestion.
Aid in weight loss and healthy eating.
I felt at the time, that the idea of fasting is complete nonsense. I reiterated that my body needs iron and asked how can it help with enhanced mental clarity if essentially, you’re limiting food intake?
Fast forward to last week!
I woke up and decided to try fasting. The first few minutes all I did was think about food. Ha-ha. I mean, my mind knew my body was limiting my food intake for 10 hours, and my stomach was struggling to comprehend the logic.
I began reading a collection of short stories to take my mind off food and after a few hours reading, I kind of forgot my hunger? Or rather, I never felt hungry. I must say that I was drinking water throughout the day. I guess you could call it a water fast.
As time progressed, I stopped feeling hungry, but I did feel a lot clearer in mind – Afterall, I didn’t have to think about what I was going to eat for lunch, or if I had enough spinach. (he-he, which is a thing I do each day!)
On the tenth hour, there was no rush to the kitchen to eat. I simply sat around a bit and thought about my relationship with food. I mean, for years I’ve always felt I needed it more than I came to realise I do. I thought more about what triggers specific eating habits:
Certain members of family/friends.
Relationship woes.
Negative life events.
I agree this may be a common thing for many people embarking/currently on their weight loss journey. But, how many of us sit and examine the impact? Some of us may acknowledge that our shitty situation has caused us to find comfort in the wrong places; food, alcohol, sex or drugs. But who among us has taken the time out to really understand why they eat how they eat?
My 10 hours of fasting opened an area of my life that I’ve ignored. Or failed to fully understand. I then repeated the fast for 2 more days and for me it helped:
Enable deep reflection on my relationship with food.
Aspects of my life that trigger poor eating habits.
What truly motivates me on my health journey.
That I don’t need to consume so much food, even if most of the food I eat is super-healthy.
Ways in which I can negate those triggers – to prevent overeating.
Would I try a water fast again?
Absolutely, I feel much better as a person for abstaining from food. I’m not sure I would try like a complete fast. But I will most certainly fast for 10 hrs at least once a week. I feel I gained a lot of positives from my experience.
Would I recommend fasting?
I would suggest that those of you who are interested in fasting, do some research first and speak to your GP if you have any health-related questions or pre-existing medical conditions.
I’ve pretty much been in bed for the last four days. I’ve been feeling quite tired due to this month’s menstruation. Which got me thinking about diet & nutrition when menstruating.
I was overcome with cravings for seeded toast with sweet popcorn sprinkled over it. And deep-fried beans with chunky chips. Only, I never gave in to those cravings as salt and sugar exasperate period cramps. They also cause me to bloat, which adds to the standard monthly bouts of pain.
It’s strange because growing up we are taught to ‘treat ourselves’ to have that chocolate doughnut because we deserve it all for being on our periods! Those few minutes of pleasure can add time to hours of pain and discomfort. I’ve learnt over this past year that everything you eat affects you in some way, shape or form – Whether that is positive or negative, is another question. But we are affected by what we eat!
I remember during my periods previously; I would be so happy to race into Selfridges and buy a box of Krispy Kremes! Like my womb was screaming out, ‘You’ve earned this Unique!’ I was lying to myself and those around me – during the period related conversations I was indulging in.
I hope the society we are growing up in changes to reflect more honest and factual content. The shit that’s seeped deep into the veins of information available, means many of us have grown up misinformed.
Life online shows only one-side, which is perfect images of perfect-looking food. But the reality for many of us is that we often have bruised or misshapen fruits and vegetables.
It is nice to see pretty pictures and click like from time to time, but my life doesn’t have that image each day. And I do find that online, there’s this huge glow of ‘everything is perfect! Look at my perfect food, perfect body, perfect life.’ And it’s unsettling, as it sends a message out to the youths in our society that if you want to be liked, then you much be perfect!
In the past, people spoke about how they felt about the models in magazines. Today, we comment, ‘she’s so pretty!’ and ‘I wish I had your body!’ and other things of that nature.
What is wrong with bruised fruit?
Now, my post isn’t shaming nice images of food – it’s simply asking for us to acknowledge that there’s nothing wrong with eating a bruised banana. Don’t we use ripened bananas to make banana bread?
I post images of real food – What my food looks like before/after preparation.
I want you all to be confident in the healthy foods that you prepare to maintain a healthy diet. Don’t feel the need to be perfect whatever that may mean. If you have social media platforms, don’t feel like you can’t share your food images because they don’t look like those accounts you follow.
You are the only version of you in existence!
Be yourself, don’t worry about anyone else.
You are the most important person in your life.
Currently, I have 9 slightly bruised bananas left. And although I will eat most in their current state, I’m going to try banana pancakes & surely, classic banana loaf!
Pineapple, cherries, pomegranate, blueberries, raspberries and water. That’s all I needed to make breakfast the other day. All the fruits were washed, chopped and frozen – waiting to be selected for this healthy delight.
How long did it take to prepare? No more than 5 minutes! And that’s no lie.
Don’t get me wrong, there have been times this year, well this month to be completely transparent, where I’ve not eaten. Stating, ‘not enough time,’ as my main and only reason. Don’t redo my mistakes, as I’m telling you that it’s not worth it.
Please ensure you embrace breakfast time and nourish your body with healthy foods to get you through to lunchtime. Skipping breakfast forces me to experience the following:
Dizzy spells
Hunger pains
Feeling weak
Low mood
Lack of energy
Mind fog
Some or all the above, for skipping breakfast. And for what purpose? To go somewhere and not feel 100%?
Whatever you have planned for your day ahead, remember to make time for breakfast.
I had walked to Marks & Spencer early in the morning yesterday, the outbound journey was alright. I had left out early, as the local weather suggested that it will be the start of a heatwave across the UK.
I was aware that I hadn’t eaten any breakfast, I was behind schedule and told myself I would pick up a vegan steak-bake on the way there. Which was the wrong decision! I grabbed a 500ml bottle of Highland Spring water and set off on my weekly food shop.
The walk there was alright, I had stopped a few times for water and to cool down. I arrive in Marks & Spencer and was pleased to see the hand-sanitiser and disinfectant at the entrance. It reminded me of honeysuckle, such a refreshing aroma. What I thought would be a simply 20-minute shop, transformed into 40, as they had changed the layout for many of my usual items.
I felt ‘safe’ in the sense that people were adhering to social-distancing rules within the store. But I was eager to get out and get back home.
My basket:
Whole Cucumber
Salad Onions
Lemon Juice
Onions
10 Bananas
Tomato and Basil Soup
Chestnut Mushrooms
Plant Kitchen Chorizo Puppies
Santini Vine Tomatoes
Velvet Houmous
Thin Tipped Asparagus
Mediterranean Pitta Bread
Iceberg Lettuce
Small Bag of Carrots
Whole Pineapple
The walk home was arduous, I felt faint and believe if I had not bought the bottle of water with me, I most certainly would have fainted. I was so relieved when I arrived back home, I quickly made a bowl of porridge and had a nap.
After about an hour or so, I woke up thirsty and added a few drops of lemon juice to a glass of cold water. At this point the heat was unbearable and for the first time in a long time, I put on some shorts and a vest top – I would never wear this ensemble outside. But I must highlight, it felt amazing to wear these, I instantly felt cooler and more refreshed from having changed and drinking cold lemon water.
Later on in the evening, I walked into my kitchen and placed a Dutch-pot on the stove, I added the mushrooms, onions and carrots first and after rifling through my cupboard and adding various things, I ended up with this random dish.
Needless to say, while I do recognise that it is random, I’m extremely proud of the variety of vegetables it contains. Which means that it is packed with vitamins and minerals. While relaxing on my sofa and listening to a Ted Talk podcast, I considered my journey to date and realised I’ve maintained the same weight for the past 10 weeks – in an ideal setting this would be fine, the setting being that goal weight has already been attained. But it hasn’t, therefore I need to either increase the amount of fitness I do or decrease the amount of food I eat.
I know many of you will find this to be an easy choice to make, but I find the whole scenario quite interesting – hence why it’s important to keep track of your journey and log any significant aspects, such as maintaining the same weight for 10 weeks. I agree, it probably shouldn’t have taken so long to see this. But lockdown life has been tough and even with the ‘ease’ of social distancing, I don’t suppose that the pressure on the mind will ease.
Outside of Marks & Spencer, people were walking by one another and with many, you could probably squeeze a small orange between them.
Thank you for reading.
Love
Unique Fatso
Where do you get your meal ideas from?
What inspires you to cook?
Do you cook based on your requirements? – For instance, I include more iron-rich foods, as I suffer from iron-deficient anaemia.
Almost a year ago, I shared with you all the horrible GP (General Practitioner) appointment I had. Which subsequently led to finding out that I had a cyst on my left ovary.
I named the cyst ‘Bean,’ as it was the size of a baked bean when I first found out about him. He grew in size and caused me the most unbearable pain throughout my daily life, which worsened during menstruation.
I was offered an acid: Mefenamic acid to be exact!
I asked about the side effects and was told the following:
May cause stomach bleeding
May cause peptic ulcers
Increase the chances of blood clots in and around and my heart.
May cause heart failure.
May cause a stroke.
Nausea
Vomiting
Diarrhoea
Rashes
Dizziness
Tinnitus
Constipation
Heart Attack
I remember thinking what is the point of taking this medication if I could end up experiencing even more complications? I ultimately felt stuck between constant pain and the outlook of additional issues to contend with.
Living with a cyst is awful! I often daydreamed being able to take it out. Mixed with nightmares of the cyst bursting and causing me even more pain.
Bean would bite into me when; I was out doing grocery shopping, running outside for 20 minutes, in the middle of the night when I was deep in sleep, in the bath when I’m soaking in salts and essential oils, during dates with potential partners. All-day every day!
Honestly, there’s only so many times that I could take painkillers and go a short time with mild pinches from Bean. I felt faulty…
Like my body was giving up! I felt like no one is going to want a woman with issues with her reproductive organs. I thought it was impossible to speak to friends/family about this because I find that when you share a problem with someone, they need to drown you in their opinions and push you into doing what they believe will benefit you. There’s also that niggling feeling at the back of my mind that reminds me, the same people may view you as faulty.
Aside from the minimal posts, I shared on my blog, I only confided in 4 people about my cyst Bean. Out of those 4, only 1 (my sister) truly stood by me and always provided me with comfort and a safe space to express myself freely. She was also an advocate for looking into natural alternatives, as I had explained that I’ll never accept the acid and its side effects as a possible solution for the pain.
Her support led me to Holland & Barrett, they sell Vegan Supplements
📸 by Unique Fatso
I started taking one a day…
After three days, the pain subsided drastically. I could not believe that it was because of these supplements so I stopped taking them and after a day, the pain returned full force. I never took them for a week, as I thought this is too good to be true.
I then started taking them again and the excruciating pain was now reduced to a less aggressive mini bolt of lightning zapping on my left ovary.
After avoiding two scans, as I was afraid to hear more bad news. I eventually agreed an appointment date/time and in my mind agreed to attend.
During my journey there, I was anxious. I kept on thinking that maybe my mind was replaying a weird placebo effect where maybe the Vegan supplements weren’t working but my mind had convinced me that they were?
Once I had arrived at my scan destination, I considered turning around and walking away…again. But like anyone who hasn’t started a family yet, but does want to have children. I had to know exactly what was going on and if anything less crazy than acid can help?
The internal scan is slightly uncomfortable and lasts only a few minutes. I highly recommend that if you’ve experienced similar issues:
Heavy periods
Pain in your abdomen
Longer periods
That you have an internal scan – Doctors can understand what’s going on better with a scan.
Nevertheless, it lasted a few minutes and as I was redressing, I asked the Nurse, ‘How big is the cyst now?’ She smiled and said, ‘Your cyst has gone completely!’
How Do I Feel Today?
Wonderful!
Lessons Learned?
Not to ignore my body. I had waited a few months after I first started getting the symptoms because I felt like I was being silly, wasting the Doctors time and I thought as many do with medical symptoms it will go away.
What Will I Take Away From This Experience?
How wonderful my sister is, how important it is to understand my body and to listen to it.
I’m also continuing with the Vegan supplements. While I don’t have any scientific proof that they helped with getting rid of Bean, I have my understanding of how I felt and the results after only a few months.
Writing this post wasn’t easy and I have been pushing it back. Sharing personal aspects of my life online is scary, as the internet invaders will sometimes go militant and highlight things, they hate about something someone has posted.
However, I set up my blog to share my health journey with everyone. I hope that if only one person reads something and feels inspired, empowered or something positive – then that is the biggest reward I can have.
Thank you to all my existing followers and welcome to my new followers.
Unique Fatso 