Fat Fridays: The Art of Depression? 28.01.2022
Since the festive period commenced in 2021, I’ve been feeling low due to many factors, both of which are tangible and intangible.
I began this new year with positive energy in mind and blessings in the form of friendships I never thought would be so nourishing in my life. *Thank you.
So what’s making me feel this way?
- I am grieving the loss of my Grandad.
- Work-related stress.
- Body confidence issues – I’ve been eating a lot of meat-free sausages and cookies.
- Educational anxiety.
For the first time in forever, I’ve succumbed to my mental battles and fallen into a deep well. I’m at the base of it, and the floor is smothered with sadness and hatred. I feel it seeping into my skin and holding me down, infecting my thoughts with endless cycles of negative visions and obstructing the healing process.
Surprisingly, a person from my past has been trying and checking in. Peering his head into the well and calling out, telling me it’s going to be okay and I’ll start to feel better. Of course, I snarled at this and dismissed him with no hesitation.
Fast forward four weeks, and I thank him for being persistent with frequent reminders that he’s here for me and…believe it or not, I’m crying as I type this up before Friday ends and Saturday intervenes.
A few hours ago, I painted a smile on my face and posted up on IG @UniqueFatso
Yes, I do! I look happy, and that’s all that matters. The Art of Depression has no generic look when it comes to taking a photo – How easy was it to smile and post? Easy.
I mean, if it helps the world to think I’m okay, which in turn causes them to skip the ‘friendly message,’ as I’m okay and they check in with someone more deserving?
If you’re at the bottom of a well or feel down and need a hug, please respond and update someone. I’m not 100%, but I’ve found a small log, and I’m sitting on it.
Equally, I implore everyone to adopt best practices and let your loved ones know that you’re there if/when they’re reading to talk. It makes a MASSIVE difference.
Special thank you to my sisters, always beacons of positive energy, love and light.
Live a healthy life,